10 Ways to Repurpose Your Ex’s Hoodie to Forget them Totally

Ah, the post-breakup hoodie. This post cover the various ways you can repurpose Ex’s Hoodie. Recall that cozy, oversized relic of a relationship that now lives in your closet like a ghost of bad decisions past. You could return it, but where’s the fun in that? Instead of letting it collect dust (or tears), let’s turn that emotional baggage into something useful. Or at least something that’ll make your friends laugh so hard they forget to ask why you’re still single.

Here are 10 gloriously petty, surprisingly practical ways to repurpose your ex’s hoodie. Because closure is overrated, and crafting is cheaper than therapy. And of course, you’re not sending it back.

1. Turn It Into a Pillowcase (For Screaming Into)

Let’s start with the obvious: that hoodie is already 90% fabric, 10% unresolved feelings. Why not turn it into a pillowcase?

How to Do It (Without Crying):

Step 1: Lay the hoodie flat and channel your inner Tim Gunn (“Make it work!”). Cut off the sleeves (bonus points if you pretend they’re symbolic of cutting ties).
Step 2: Sew the neckhole shut using a needle and thread, or fabric glue if you’re as commitment-phobic as your ex.
Step 3: Stuff the body with old T-shirts (the ones you cried into during Week 1 of the breakup) or actual pillow fluff.

Pro Tip: Use the hood as a built-in sleep mask for those nights you’re binge-watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and pretending you’re “over it.”

Why It’s Genius:

Wake up every morning with a literal reminder of why you’re better off alone.
Crying into a hoodie-pillow is quieter than sobbing into your phone at 2 a.m. (and less likely to result in accidental drunk texts).

Caution:

May accidentally smell like their cologne. Proceed with Febreze.
If you name the pillow “Steve” and start talking to it, maybe skip this project.

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2. Fashion a Dog Sweater (So Even Your Pet Can Judge Them)

Your dog already side-eyes your life choices. Now they can do it in style.

How to Do It (While Your Dog Judges You):

Step 1: Lay the hoodie flat and trace your dog’s silhouette like you’re a deranged breakup Picasso. Cut armholes in the sides.
Step 2: Slip it over your pup’s head like a tiny, judgmental poncho.
Step 3: Use the hood as a hat for maximum sass. Pair with a monocle for aristocratic disdain.

Pro Tip:

Small dog? Use a sleeve as a scarf.
Large dog? Congrats, you’ve invented a dog-sized Snuggie. Post pics with the caption: “Who needs a significant other when you’ve got a significant pupper?”

Why It’s Genius:

Your ex’s hoodie finally does something useful—keeping your dog warm while you passive-aggressively post pics tagged #TeamSingle.
Dogs are natural comedians. Watching them waddle in a hoodie-sweater is cheaper than Netflix.

Caution:

If your dog tears it to shreds, it’s not “destruction of property.” It’s “art therapy.”
Avoid using hoodies with zippers. Your dog’s dignity is already at risk.

3. Make a Reusable Shopping Bag (For Passive-Aggressive Grocery Runs)

Nothing says “I’m eco-friendly AND petty” like carrying kale in a bag made from your ex’s hoodie.

How to Do It (With Zero Chill):

Step 1: Cut off the sleeves and neckline like you’re editing them out of your life.
Step 2: Sew the bottom hem shut with stitches as tight as your grip on resentment.
Step 3: Attach the sleeves as straps. For extra flair, stitch “Recycled Regret” onto the front.

Pro Tip:

Use the hood to smuggle snacks into movies. Multitasking!
Bring it to Whole Foods and loudly announce, “This bag? Oh, it’s upcycled.”

Why It’s Genius:

Every time you shop, you’ll remember how they never once unloaded the dishwasher. Sustainable? Yes. Bitter? Absolutely.
It’s a conversation starter. “Oh, this old thing? It’s from my ex. No, I’m totally fine!”

Caution:

Avoid using it for heavy items. The only thing worse than a broken heart is a broken bag spilling lentils in the Trader Joe’s parking lot.
If you spot your ex while carrying it, resist the urge to swing it like a weapon. (But if you do… we’re not judging.)

4. Create a Halloween Costume (Go as “Ghosted”)

Why be a basic ghost when you can be a specific kind of ghost?

How to Do It (With Maximum Drama):

Step 1: Wear the hoodie backward and draw cobwebs on it with fabric paint. Add glitter for ✨sparkle trauma✨.
Step 2: Carry a sign that says, “Will Haunt for Closure.” Optional: Attach a tiny urn labeled “My Expectations.”
Step 3: Hand out candy with passive-aggressive labels like:
- “Fun-Size ‘You’re Bad at Texting’ Bar”
- “Sour Patch ‘We Need to Talk’ Gummies”

Pro Tip:

Host a breakup-themed Halloween party. Themes include:
- “Zombie Relationship” (for the ex who won’t stop texting)
- “Frankenstein’s Date Night” (stitched together from failed Tinder matches)

Why It’s Genius:

It’s the only time “ghosting” is socially acceptable.
Free candy > free therapy.

Caution:

Might attract actual ghosts. Or worse—your ex’s new partner.
If you get drunk and text them at midnight, blame the costume.

5. Craft an Emergency Mop (For Spills… and Metaphorical Messes)

Adulting is hard. Cleaning up your ex’s symbolic debris? Harder.

How to Do It (While Chugging Wine):

Step 1: Slip the hoodie onto a Swiffer like you’re dressing a very sad scarecrow.
Step 2: Secure it with rubber bands (or the hair ties they left at your place).
Step 3: Mop away the remnants of their “I need space” text.

Pro Tip:

Add glitter to the hoodie first. Now you’re not cleaning—you’re “manifesting a fresh start.”
Play I Will Survive on loop for maximum empowerment.

Why It’s Genius:

Finally, something that soaks up tears and spilled rosé.
The floor will shine brighter than your future.

Caution:

Do NOT let them see you doing this. (Unless you want to. Petty is a vibe.)
If the mop starts giving you relationship advice, seek help.

6. Sew It Into a Plant Protector (Because Even Your Fern Deserves Better)

Your plants are thriving. Your love life? Not so much.

How to Do It (With Botanic Vengeance):

Step 1: Cut the hoodie into strips like you’re shredding their love letters.
Step 2: Wrap them around plant pots like tiny, vengeful scarves.
Step 3: Use the hood to cover plants during frost. Finally, something warm they’ll appreciate!

Pro Tip:

Write affirmations on the fabric strips: “You’re Enough,” “Photosynthesis > Heartbreak,” etc.
Name your plants after your ex’s worst habits (“This is Kevin, aka ‘Never Loaded the Dishwasher’”).

Why It’s Genius:

Your monstera will never judge you for talking to it about your ex.
Plants can’t ghost you. (Unless you forget to water them. Then they’ll just… die.)

Caution:

Overwatering + hoodie fabric = mold. Much like your relationship.
If your fern starts wilting, it’s not a metaphor. Probably.

7. DIY a Face Mask (For When You Need to “Detox”)

Self-care is important. So is spite.

How to Do It (While Ignoring Their Texts):

Step 1: Soak the hoodie in green tea and aloe (or $28 “healing” serum from Sephora).
Step 2: Cut eyeholes like you’re preparing for a spa heist.
Step 3: Lie down, slap it on your face, and “reflect on your choices.”

Pro Tip:

Add cucumber slices to each eye. Now you’re ~fancy~ and emotionally unavailable.
Play a guided meditation titled “Releasing Toxic Energy (and Exes).”

Why It’s Genius:

You’ll emerge glowing—or at least too relaxed to care that they’re dating someone named “Brittany.”
It’s cheaper than a facial, and you get to destroy their hoodie. Win-win.

Caution:

May cause flashbacks to their Netflix password.
If your face turns green, it’s not “detoxing.” It’s the fabric dye.

8. Turn It Into an Art Project (Channel That Angst)

Call it The Ballad of Broken Promises and charge $500 for it.

How to Do It (Like a Tortured Artist):

Step 1: Stretch the hoodie over a canvas like you’re framing their red flags.
Step 2: Splatter paint while blasting Alanis Morissette. Add glitter for ✨drama✨.
Step 3: Glue on “found objects” (e.g., their guitar pick, crumpled movie tickets, a dried rose from that one decent date).

Pro Tip:

Display it prominently when mutual friends visit.
Submit it to a local gallery under the category “Modern Tragedies.”

Why It’s Genius:

Art is pain. So is dating. Monetize both.
It’s a conversation piece. Literally. (“This? Oh, it’s my emotional baggage. NBD.”)

Caution:

May accidentally become a viral TikTok. Prepare for DMs like, “U ok?”
If your ex buys it, you’ve officially won capitalism.

9. Donate It… But First, Hide It in a Charity Pile (Let Karma Do the Work)

The ultimate power move: weaponize their hoodie for good.

How to Do It (With Silent Fury):

Step 1: Wait for a clothing drive. Smile sweetly as you drop off your ex’s hoodie.
Step 2: Bury it under old sweaters like you’re hiding a body.
Step 3: Whisper, “This is for the time you forgot my birthday.”

Pro Tip:

Slip a note in the pocket: “Wash before wearing. Metaphorically.”
Track the hoodie’s journey via thrift store hashtags. (No, that’s not creepy. It’s closure.)

Why It’s Genius:

You’re helping the less fortunate and your own sanity.
Karma gets a nudge, and you get to feel morally superior.

Caution:

May feel a sudden urge to clap back at their Instagram stories. Resist.
If you see someone wearing it, do NOT confront them. (Unless they’re Brittany. Then, maybe.)

10. Use It as Bonfire Kindling (The Catharsis You Deserve)

Sometimes, you just need to watch things burn.

How to Do It (Safely, Ish):

Step 1: Gather friends, marshmallows, and a fire pit. Call it a “Burn Party.”
Step 2: Toss the hoodie into the flames while playing Disco Inferno.
Step 3: Chant: “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, your Spotify playlist was mid at best.”

Pro Tip:

Roast a marshmallow over the flames. Sweet revenge tastes like s’mores.
Save a scrap of fabric for a voodoo doll. (Kidding. Unless…)

Why It’s Genius:

Fire is therapeutic. So is legally questionable arson.
It’s a ritual. Like smudging your apartment, but with more spite.

Caution:

Check local burn ordinances. And maybe delete their number first.
If you cry during the burn, blame the smoke.

Final Thoughts

Look, we’ve all been there. That hoodie isn’t just fabric—it’s a time capsule of inside jokes, unmet expectations, and the haunting realization that they definitely stole your favorite lip balm. But whether you turn it into a pillow, a plant cozy, or a sacrificial offering to the breakup gods, remember: the best revenge is living well.

Or, you know, living petty. Either works.

Now go forth and craft like you’ve never crafted before. And if anyone asks why you’re cutting up a hoodie with manic glee? Just smile and say, “Sustainability, baby.”

Bonus: If all else fails, mail the hoodie to their mom. Passive aggression is hereditary, right?